# - Love ;; __ it's true .
Wednesday, July 08, 2009

im feeling so messed up now..
life's hasn't been the same ever since my dad got this illness..
i guess i screwed up my own life by increasing my expenses each month..
i feel so irritated with myself now.. why do i have to spend $ on stuffs..
carelessness lead to me having to buy a new phone..
foolishness lead me to spent money i shouldnt be spending..

the economy crisis is kicking in for me..
things doesnt happens the way i wan to..
i have a negative balance which im trying hard to clear but it's an uphill task..
people around me having their own problems too.. wish i could help..
if only i had the financial power to solve all these problems..
life is stagnant to me now. almost nth interest me anymore..
i jus wish i can get myself out of this shit soon.. but i dun see it happening anytime soon..

pressure is setting in from everywhere.. only way to release them is by playing sports
tat's the only thing tat i can do to temporary remove the thoughts in my mind..
i got myself into tis shit n now i really dun feel gd at all..

hanging on, being tough is a chore.. tired of shouldering wad is on my back
but i no longer have control of my life.. life is controlling me..
if there's god, pls take pity of me. ur help will be greatly appreciate..
really wonder if i had been doing the right thing all along.. doubt myself..

deep deep shit.. falling apart
on 10:08 PM